The Beginning

Well this is where my blog begins. I've thought about starting a blog plenty of times before and actually have prior to this without actually posting any blogs. My motivation for actually doing it now is I really want and need a way to express myself outside of my personal journal. "Thoughts, Blessings, and Lessons Learned" - I always thought that this would be the title of my autobiography after I become really famous for some kind of invention or cure that helped better humanity or something of that nature- ha ha. But since not too many people even know I exisit, I guess it will suffice as my blog title.

Right now, I'm "unemployed"- I used quotations because to me that is such a relative term. I run a small (very small) photography business so in some sense I'm not unemployed and most days I have plenty of things to do. I have been without a "real job" since February of 2009- almost a year now. I refuse to let this time of my life go by without taking it as a "Lesson learned." There is nothing in life that we go through that is just for our own heartache. It is to teach us a lesson thus making us a better person. A few things I've learned from being unemployed (like I said I don't really like using that word- we'll just say since I've been without a steady pay check- yeah, that's more like it):
1. The value of a dollar & how to budget- I have some of the best parents a girl could ever ask for, seriously I do! My friends have always made fun of me for being spoiled and I will readily admit that I am. We are not rich BY ANY MEANS!! So don't get it twisted. But I will say that God has blessed my family and never have I had to go without. Point being, as grateful as I am for my parents and the many opportunities they have afforded for me, I do believe that in some ways I was sheltered from learning how to budget merely because of my parents willingness to help me whenever I was in trouble. So since I've been without a steady pay check, I've had no choice but to make the best decisions concerning my money- certain things take greater priority than others and my financial priorities have changed greatly!!
2. Unemployed people have lives too- One thing I've noticed is that since I don't work 8-5 at the office is that people seem to think that you can do any and everything for them. Not that I don't mind doing things for people. I enjoy helping people as best I can. But my inability to say no has gotten me into overwhelming situations. So this unemployment has forced me to learn to say no so that I don't stress myself out being everyone's gopher.
3. God will supply all of my needs- I am forever grateful to my Lord and Savior for sustaining me during this period of my life. Yes, my parents and some friends have helped me tremendously but they were all mere REsources coming from the true Source- my Heavenly Father. Not once in the past year have I gone without a meal, without clothes, and I've had gas in my tank. Now granted I haven't had all the best clothes and latest fashions like I've wanted, but I can always go to my closet and find something to wear- and that's a true blessing. And no, I haven't always had a full gas tank- but I have not gone without. I recognize that God is the sustainer of my life and my Jehovah Jireh- My Provider. He PROvides for me- I honestly believe that before I even lost my job that He had mapped out how He was going to provide for me during this time in my life. I'm eternally grateful to Him.

Another big thing in my life at the moment that is causing me to change as a person is this weight loss process I am going through. What I am realizing is how much of a mental and spiritual thing this truly is. I used to be smaller back in high school. I played soccer all the time and I loved to run. I went to college and stopped running and playing soccer therefore I gained weight. The 4.5 years I was in college, I gained 70 pounds. That's crazy! In December of 2009, I went snowboarding with some of my friends. That night, not only was I terrible at snowboarding- ha ha (even though I loved it!)- I realized how terribly out of shape I was. That following week I joined a gym and started working out regularly. As it stands today, since that day that I joined the gym (December 11) I have lost 18.5 pounds. More than the pounds I've lost, I've noticed a change in my mental state. Ha ha- that sounds like I'm a crazy person or something. But I'm truly realizing the mental strength it takes to do this. When I'm running on the treadmill I have to talk to myself because trust me, after about 10 minutes, I want to stop. But I have tell my body to keep going. I'm planning on running the Cooper River Bridge Run in Charleston on March 27. It's a 10K- which is 6.25 miles. Right now I'm running at 2.25 miles. I'm going to try to up it today to 2.5 miles. Like I said, yes there is physical part to it all but I'm realizing that most of it is mental- I have to mentally push myself and my body will have no choice but to arrest itself to my thoughts. I've learned that's the case with anything, but that's another blog for another day. I started running at the gym, well jogging, on the treadmill at 4.0 speed and did .25 miles the very first time. Each day, I increased my distance and speed a little. I knew that if I pushed myself too hard at first that it would be like any of my other fitness endevours and I would be so sore for a week that I would never go back to the gym. So I took it slow, very slow. And although, I'm not to the point where I want to be physically I'm on my way. I don't want to just lose this weight for me (although one of the main reasons is to be more healthy since heart problems run in my family), but I want to help others who may be battling this same weight issue. (What I'm about to say I have never told anyone about this experience so this is really me putting my thoughts out here) My friend Andrea (my best friend's sister) is such a sweet person with such a caring heart. I told her about my personal fitness goals one day and she was so encouraging and put the song "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus on her facebook and said that it was for me. So the next day I went to the gym and the whole time I was on the treadmill, I put that song on repeat. I reached a goal that day- it was .75 miles. I was literally in tears when I finished. That's the day I realized that this was more than just a physical journey, it is also an emotional and mental healing process. So as this process in my life evolves, I'll be blogging about it too.

Well that's enough blogging for today.

Have an awesome day!!